WritingShort story critique
Short story critique before contests or magazines
Pricefrom $12
Payment protectionDetails
- Revisions within the package are free.
- If you do not respond within 3 days of delivery, the work is accepted automatically.
The money is reserved when you pay and released only once you accept the work.
Example result
Example for the Standard package
Manuscript critique: opening chapters of a small-town mystery
Overall impression
The voice is the strongest thing here: warm, a little wry, with a clear sense of the harbour town. The mystery itself starts too late. The body is found on page 19; until then we have two chapters of setup that are pleasant but low on tension.
Plot and structure
- Chapter 1 introduces Nell's bookshop, her cat, her ex-husband and the festival committee. Four threads at once, none with a question attached.
- The lighthouse keeper's death would work far better as the end of chapter 1, not the middle of chapter 3.
- The festival deadline is a good ticking clock. Mention it early and keep returning to it.
Characters and dialogue
Nell is likeable, but mostly passive in the opening: things happen near her rather than because of her. Give her one small choice in chapter 1 that has consequences later.
Dialogue is natural, but characters often explain what both already know:
"As you know, Nell, the lighthouse has been closed since the storm three years ago."
Suggested: "Still closed?" Nell nodded at the lighthouse. "Three years, and they still haven't fixed the door."
Style and language
- Strong sensory details: "the smell of tar and lemon soap" sets the scene in six words.
- Overuse of "just" (41 times) and "suddenly" (12 times) softens tension.
- Several long paragraphs of backstory in chapter 2 (pp. 11–13) stop the scene; spread them across later chapters.
What works
- The cat, Admiral, is a charming running joke without stealing scenes
- The town feels lived in; secondary characters are distinct from first appearance
- Nell's humour fits the genre perfectly
Revision plan
- Move the discovery of the body to the end of chapter 1; cut or compress what comes before
- Give Nell a decision in chapter 1 (e.g., she lends the keeper a book that is later found with him)
- Remove "as you know" exchanges; let the reader infer
- Search and trim "just" and "suddenly" by at least half
- Move backstory from chapter 2 into short flashes later in the book
- Plant the festival deadline in the first two pages
Client: first-time novelist. Text: chapters 1–3 of The Lantern Keeper, a cozy mystery, 4,800 words. Author's question: "Does the opening hook readers, and is my detective likeable?"
The client and all details are made up.
About this service
Horror lives or dies on dread, so we read your novel to see where the fear builds, where it leaks away and whether the scares are earned. We look at pacing between quiet and frightening scenes, the rules of your monster or haunting, how much is shown versus left in the dark, and whether the ending pays off the dread. The critique is tuned to your subgenre, whether folk, cosmic, psychological, slasher or haunted house.
What is included
- What you getA written critique: overall impression, strengths, problems with quotes from your pages, a map of where tension rises and drops and a revision plan. Premium adds line edits of the opening.
- Dread and tensionWhere it builds and where it leaks away
- Earned scaresSet-up before each shock
- Rules of the horrorMonster, curse or haunting kept consistent
- Shown and unseenWhen to reveal and when to hold back
- Ending payoffWhether it delivers on the fear
How it works
- 1BriefYou paste or attach the pages and the subgenre
- 2ReadingWe track tension scene by scene
- 3CritiqueYou get the tension map and a revision plan
What we need from you
The text pasted into the brief, the subgenre, a short synopsis if it is an excerpt and the effect you want readers to feel. Documents can also be attached as PDF, Word or Excel files.
We will ask you:
- Which horror subgenre is it?
- What should readers feel by the end?
- How graphic is the book meant to be?
- Is this a complete work or an excerpt?
Compare packages
| Packages | BasicExcerpt up to 2,000 words$20 | StandardUp to 5,000 words$39 | PremiumUp to 10,000 words with line edits$75 |
|---|---|---|---|
| Deadline | 2 days | 3 days | 5 days |
| Revisions | 1 | 2 | 3 |
| Text length | up to 2,000 words | up to 5,000 words | up to 10,000 words |
| Revision plan | Yes | Yes | Yes |
| Line edits | No | No | first 1,500 words |
| Order Basic | Order Standard | Order Premium |
Payment protection
You pay when you order, but the money is released only for accepted work.
- Fixed priceThe package price does not change after you pay.
- The money is reservedWhen you pay, the amount is only reserved. It is released to the service once you accept the work.
- Checked before deliveryEvery result goes through a quality check before it reaches you, and you see it on the order page before accepting it.
- Free revisionsAsk for changes within your brief as many times as the package allows.
- Acceptance after 3 daysIf within 3 days of delivery you neither accept the work nor ask for changes, it is accepted automatically. If you write in the order chat after delivery, the order waits; once we answer, we may start the 3 days again and will say so in the chat.
- Redo or a full refundIf the result does not match your brief and the revisions did not fix it, or the work takes more than twice its deadline, write in the order chat: we will redo the work or refund the payment in full.
Questions and answers
Do you read graphic violence?
Yes, as part of the story for adult readers. We comment on how it serves the fear, not on whether it is too much.
Can you tell if my twist is predictable?
Yes. We note where we guessed it and what gave it away.
Will you rewrite my story?
No. You get notes on what to change and why, and the scares stay yours to write. Premium also line-edits the opening.
Is my manuscript kept private?
Yes. Your text is used only for your order.
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